The New Man in my Life - J

It’s not easy task to describe the mood when you finally meet that man in your life, the man you were waiting for all these whiles-the perfect partner-your man. He’s J-my latest obsession(Refer Pic). It’s been eight months since we first shook hand at the induction. Ahh! Those first moments when we felt each other’s energy in our hands, those were special and we are hand in pants since then. People! spar mae da horr (Spare me the horror) but he is the most charming face around (his skin, his stubble, his height, his lean but toned bod…… omg)- he is my newest

man after all. It becomes very difficult for me to suffer the office chores when he is not around. He comes over to my cubicle every twenty minute and I go to his after another ten minutes, means we are only ten minutes away from us. What clicks for us, why we so much like each other’s company, why are we an item are some of the things we will discuss in this Fashion-ably compelling Dostana tale?

Some random matchings-matings-musings-

>We are both from small towns with big dreams and lost trains. Yes, so are many but hell we care.
>We both are Big Time Brand Savvy-Italian brands to be specific. We both started our brands’ affair with Benetton (Benetau, this is how it’s actually pronounced) but he’s more inclined towards Sisley. Our ratio of apparel shopping is 1:2. i.e. for every single piece I buy he brings two and thanks to his business background. Our recent common crush is Alcott and Boggi is next in pipeline. Gucci, Armani, TOD, Zegna and Ferrari will have to wait for a while but they are not out of contention. Madura Garments and Arvind Brands are also in the fray but only when the stuff is good and different and we are in first week of the month. And we are expert in mixing Sarojini Nagar stuff with GK-1 and Janpath with Khan Market. (Yeh Jalwa Fashion Ka Hai).

>We need each other to bitch about anything and everything and we love it.

>We both are great readers and between us, we have crossed ten fiction ordeals including three gems from Chetan Bhagat and incidentally we read Fountainhead as well. So, how diverse/digressed our taste is, you can imagine.

>We both had an instant crush for Howard Roark and we jointly tried to figure out how he would walk, how one can flaunt one’s indifferent best etc. The mediocre we are we both failed. We even went to a corporate event to have first person glimpse of a real life Roark. His achievements are rock solid and he’s an architect but the way he was squeezing that cigarette we both were hugely disappointed. He almost raped the whitely clad babe. He was so hungry for attention- so us-ish that we immediately left the scene before he could open his mouth. On the way back J told me “Man, you play Roark better while in smokes than that idiot. Hold the puff baby, hold it, somebody, tell him yaar. And he became an architect just because he liked Fountainhead-asshole.”

>I am not much of a hunk but then he is not that cheap and that’s how we compliment each other.

>But the one that did it all, the one that started this Fire, the one that resulted in this bang-bang bond is the fact that we both worship Arjun Rampal. “Really?” “YES, really.” These were our pleasantly surprised reactions at the news and boys, did we hit off from that point onwards? Normally, I don’t care if I have a colleague who is sincere, docile, concerned, whatever. He’s just a colleague after all and he will stab you at the first opportunity. I never do nor does J. But both of us had faced the same bouncers over the years. “Arjun is a deadpan, he can’t emote, he is so uninteresting,” and the most heinous of the lot “He has got a husky tongue.” I almost killed a dear pal over this ass shoot off. Arjun, after all has the manliest of a voice next only to Mr. Amitabhji Bachhan. We had paid heavily over the years for our common devotion. So, all we needed in our life was not some handsome hike neither a chirpy chick, we badly required a fellow who could rant Rampal like we did. And we are happy to have finally met us. For heaven’s sake it’s not due to Rock On or OSO but I would say, despite them. We have backed him even when he gave 11 duds in a row. Recently, we have applied for a joint license for AK47 (directly with ISI), especially, for lumberjacks who say: John is better/ Hrithik is hunk/ Saif is royal/ stumpy Shahid is cute/ Salman is a rock star/ Dino’s got good packs too/ even Zayed is a shining star. Keep mum wherever you are or we won’t mind going on a killing spree. However, there is some respite but only for the members of Johnny Depp fan club and that too for the fact that we want some competition at the international level. Nishant Dahiya is a potential Indian threat though. He's my bro and I am biased but I am never wrong in predicting an existing big thing. Coming back to us, J, for your information, recently tabooed err tattooed both his forearms ala Arjun. (The sucker got to meet Him in one of the Rock On concert and couldn’t even sms me about it. He was kick asssed meeting him and I kicked his ass knowing this). He’s an adorable son though. He actually tattooed his parents’ epithets- so nice but so unlike me.

>One of the whacky things from a long list that we often do. Once for a meeting, we were standing right in the middle of an international hospitality masterpiece (The Park) and national heritage herald (Jantar Mantar). We were waiting there for the valet to get us the car who was taking time and we both were hungry. Suddenly, J picked up his prathanas brought to him regularly by this sweet colleague of ours N. These were maithi ones and nothing was stuffed inside and we rolled them and started chewing like crazy. It was only later that we realized these two beautiful babes, they were staring us all this time. We are still clueless were they hungry for our attention or those prathanas? It was special as it was not planned. It was instant and reminded both of us of our college days.

>The only good part of our job is that ride we take from CP to Saket 3-times a week. Until India Gate we talk about job and clients, by Jor Bagh the topic is changed to aims and dreams, by the time we cross Lodhi Colony we are done with lost love in our lives. At Ansal Plaza we start bitching about colleagues and by the time we get to Saket we are able to finish our quota of Movies, Music and other Miscellaneous Matters.

Ergo, if you think, we have Broken our Backs over some Mountain or Minted Moans in Moonlit Miami, you are taking it wrong, dude. We are “Straight as an arrow.” At times, I think of our relation-shit err ship and I am glad finding it’s not an oath of life long friendship nor it’s in face frolicking and butt back biting bit as is the case in an organizational set up. Here are two individuals enjoying each other from 10 till 6 until it’s too late and nothing else thereafter. Yes, there are occasional “Catch Zoom-Arjun is there in Kingfisher Calendar Launch party” from his side and “HBO-Perfect Stranger 10 minutes from now, edited but still an awesome femme fatale” from me but nothing more. We never hang out on weekends. Also, he is a spoilsport- doesn’t drink nor smokes. It’s because of his simplicity that I hung on to him and my oneliners keep him going.

In short, though I made it so long, we are two beings trying to make fun out of a boring, killing and not sure tomorrow job and we have no string attached whatsoever. Normally, I feel compelled in a relationship; there are so many unspoken and unstated expectations. But this one is beautiful and free flowing. And I enjoy such hassle free hitches. He doesn’t give a damn about my hinterland hangovers and I care least about his business baggage. We don’t care who actually we are as long as we are ourselves and that makes it special.

Make what you have to and one last time hell is all I care.